Why Blanco Niño?

Well, because those who have seen me know that if I were any paler, I’d be translucent. And because I recently completed a lengthy peregrination through South America where I had an utterly phenomenal time, but – in spite of my valiant efforts to just once string together a reasonably competent Spanish sentence when I needed it – was always very clearly the gringo-est of the gringos.

But mostly because this still makes me laugh every. single. time.

Thanks, Fenslerfilm.

No, but I mean “why” in a more existential sense.

Ah. Well, because ever since I recently committed to the damn-fool idea of quitting a well-paying, stable job to pursue a writing career at a time when writers are a dime a dozen and the economy can only be described as “shitful”, I figured, “Hey, now might be a good time to actually start writing things that people can read!” WIN!

Oh, and I tend to wander around and get into odd, occasionally humorous and sometimes decidedly uncomfortable situations. As I mentioned above, I recently did a whole bunch of traveling that featured quite a few bona fide “adventures” involving blood, dirt, brushes with death, and the consumption of many large bottles of piss-grade beer – by comparison, nowadays my adventures mainly consist of getting into arguments with my Super, looking for freelance work, and dealing with my neurotic dog. But you never know when I might surprise you. Until then, I’ll at least try to keep things interesting.

If you’re really trying to learn Spanish, you should probably know that the correct syntax would be “Niño Blanco”.

Yes. I know.